Instagram - We are all narcissists

Don't get us wrong; over here at the Pretty Pretty Bang Bang HQ we love Instagram. We, like all other iPhone users under the age of 29 years, use Instagram to capture any and all of our day-to-day visual ramblings.

Why do we use Instagram? Easy, because we are bored narcissists; why else do we participate in any form of social media, really? We tell ourselves it is in order to keep up-to-the-minute and to reconnect with friends and acquaintances from our pasts. Um, false. We are merely trying to demonstrate to the world just how cool we look wearing bright lipstick and enormous sunglasses when captured at precisely the right angle.

Now, true to inimitable PPBB form, we will describe to you the ways in which we experience Instagram:

Please note: most sample Instagrams are taken directly from our feeds and personal snaps.


1. Obviously we adore it when celebs open up their lives to us with social media through carefully curated personal images. It is an attempt to take their public image into their own incapable hands and have us share in the lavishness of it all. We’ve also developed a cagey obsession with catching celeb mid Instagram (i.e. Busy Phillips and Michelle Williams at the Oscars. Cute!)

2. Our mundane everyday objects look freaking cool! "Holy shit this grilled cheese looks fucking gourmet! Instagram it!" read: I am so cultured I could die. Just take in my superior gastronomic pursuits.

3. When strangers like our photos we feel so much more popular and artistic. Generally, when this happens one of the following thoughts cross these pretty little minds:

a. "I must really be tapping into a subculture of cool with this cute photo of my cat!"
b. "This is fucking profound"
c. "People must really like Tintin!"

4. If you take the time to hash tag a large scale happening, say a concert or sporting event, you can instantly examine, nay judge, how hundreds or thousands are experiencing the exact same thing. This is actually pretty darn cool and occasionally hilarious.

5. Catching fellow users on the subway trying to conceal the fact they follow those tantalizing feeds featuring exclusively shirtless males. You know who you are. These tasty samples come to you courtesy of Boiznoize.


1. Facebook owns it. This isn’t the end of the world or anything, we just feel slightly indignant towards Mark Zuckerberg taking over the universe and all the social media we currently utilize. Although have noticed zero change since aforementioned acquisition and we are fully annoyed that we now can’t just tap twice to like something on Facebook. Also so far your Instagrams are the worst, get it together Zucky.

2. You feel totally shitty about yourself when no one likes your picture. Let’s face it, there is nothing sadder than when you are forced to ask your bestie to “like” your photo in an attempt to save face. A recent post of a formerly impressive sock bun is getting ZERO traction and we can’t understand what went wrong.

3. If we see someone Instagram another picture of macaroons or a Starbucks cup consider it an insta-defollow. Nothing personal, these are not new discoveries and it’s hard to make them look interesting. Why you insist on cluttering my innocent feed is beyond comprehension.

4. Serious FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out). It’s a total knife through the heart to see your friends hanging out without you. Particularly since X-pro II has made them look so damn amazing while doing so. Cue depression.

5. When you and your buddy quite literally Instagram the same thing/occurrence and every last mutual acquaintance you have likes their picture first. Chalk this one up to life just not being that fair. (See below for real life example. Lauren: 6 likes 3 comments, Caitlin: 0 likes 0 comments.)

So there you have it, we accept instagram in all its favours and faults. In the immortal words of Tim Riggins: “Let's make some memories."

Also please follow us on instagram @c_wils @hartla

Self-lovingly yours,

Keeping Up with Kris’ Krucifixion

Before you jump to any conclusions, I haven’t pulled a Kris Jenner and been unfaithful to my favorite reality royals; I have just been silently mourning the loss of Khloe and Lamar thus haven’t been able to talk Dash publically until now. But last night I was able to pull myself together and kaught up on the current happenings and a lot is going on, with Kris that is. Her dreams have finally come true as she is front and center this season, accentuating those questionable parenting and marvelous marketing skills.

Back in the day Kris was up to some extra marital activates, tisk tisk! For one, I feel duped for not realizing earlier that this was really all part of an elaborate subplot 20 years in the making,she's one wiley momager! These colourful indiscretions have taught us a lot so far this season. Particularly that if one day you plan on famewhoring out your family you better plant some seeds early to make Season 7 a smashing success:

First and foremost, cheat on your irrelevantly prominent husband now. This will later evolve into an insignificant paternity issue for one of your children and make for a riveting season premiere for your reality series.

Secondly during this years Olympics find a complacent athlete (from any specialty really, Kris recommends track) that you can marry; ensure he has children. This will all make sense when your eldest daughter enlists said blended family to awkwardly prank complacent athlete husband number two. This works as a more lighthearted series subplot. You’ve got to keep a nice balance and this is Bruce Jenner approved.

Finally, ensure that the eldest of your offspring carry’s around a lot of emotional baggage re: the above; this is best achieved by flirting with, then making numerous comments about sleeping with attractive younger men as well as writing a racy tell all. You may not see the fruits of this labour until she is, herself a mother but wait for it; it makes for tantalizing television as it heavily influences her romantic relationship with a humorously arrogant secondary character.

So please go ahead and flourish. It is what Kris would want, and I look forward to tuning into E! Network to watch your efforts dramatically unfold --- note: when this happens, per Kimmy’s sage advice don’t believe you can get away with doing your own hair and make-up anymore, try as hard as possible at all times.

In other news Rob has a sock line. I havn’t yet figured out where that fits into the master plan, but we are only 3 episodes in, so stay tuned.

Dashingly yours,


Decor Inspiration: Posters

For some people, i.e. us, going to your local gallery and purchasing a beautiful, one of a kind, original piece of art, is a dream that will take years of hard work and saving to fulfil. That's why we like posters! Frame up a sarcastic, witty or pretentious poster to show your home visitors just how hilarious you really are. It's that simple.

1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5 / 6 / 7

I Wish I Had Done Everything On Earth With You...

Just so we are all clear, I am obsessing over this incredible The Great Gatsby trailer; dreaming up scenarios in which Gatsby requests a private audience with ME! In addition to my current preoccupation with 50 Shades of Grey, this trailer has pushed my week onto the wrong side of RACY.

In my heart, I am hoping that you all care as much as I do and have also been patiently longing for any brief glimmer of Leo’s Jay Gatsby. If you haven’t seen it, first of all, what is wrong with you, but more importantly, you’re in for a gleaming treat.

You just got chills when No Church in the Wild started playing...right?!

In anticipation,


Recap: The Bachelorette - Episode 1

Here we go again, it is Bachelorette season and in what I guess was a nod to the upcoming Olympics, Emily Maynard showed up in an ice dancing costume --- she is so sweet that Chris Harrison probably didn’t have the heart to tell her it’s the wrong athletic season.

Anyway, usual story: Emily is looking to find the love of her fabricated life among an insane crop of men who presume they are the one; of course we will be riveted until someone puts that ABC funded ring on Emily’s finger and to make that viewing more bearable we have categorized some notable men using descriptive monikers:

Losers to Avoid:

Michael: Taylor Kitsch wanna be

Travis: Guy brandishing egg

Joe: Dawson Leery

Stevie: Party MC

Alessandro: Botox Brazilian 

Stay tuned for more Pretty Pretty Bang Bang unrequited Bachelorette criticisms!

Anatomy of a Hottie: Gosling the Jetsetter Edition

Stop us if this is creepy, but sometimes don’t you feel like you actually know Ryan Gosling because you talk about him so much? This week we were elated to see our buddy Ryan arriving at JFK and even more so because he was looking pretty darn perfect.  Sure, we liked this look a lot less yesterday when he accessorized it with Eva Mendes, but we are willing to blow past; you’re supposed to be happy for your friends when they get into relationships, aren’t you?

If this airport look doesn’t suffice, feel free to educate yourself here on the exquisite travel looks of Mr. Ryan Gosling.

Happy Friday,


Thursday Chuckle: Dear Jon Hamm

Jon Hamm wants us to slow our roll when it comes to getting “serious” with a boy, to define our own style and confirms that boys totally get crushes on us too! What a comical relief.

We are taking this advice very seriously, hope that's not offensive to anybody.

Morning After: Met Gala 2012

We don't think it is a coincidence that the Met Gala overlaps with good old high school Prom season. It is A-List Prom and fashion is everyone's date of choice.

For your enjoyment and unadulterated judgement we have summed up the night's dominant looks.

Couleur du Jour: ORANGE This colour has simply taken over the red carpet! And we adore it! Ginnifer Goodwin is looking particularly smashing in her tangerine gown. Whereas Kirsten Dunst looks like Olive Oyl. As in Popeye and Olive Oyl. Also, Kirsten, you are not 90 and as much as we wish it, this isn't Downton Abbey.

Too Sparkly for Words: Bonjour sparkles and beautiful metallics! These glitterati are covered head to toe in the flashiest of fabrics. This category is extensive and can only be explained as scintillating and in some cases very Game of Thrones chic.

Feather Bottoms: Here name was all seriousness, we approve of these looks (Aside from Beyonce. As much as it pains us to admit, Baby Blue can't save you here, this is a total miss dearest Bey). Diane Kruger's frock looks wonderfully like a volumous nightgown that could only be worn in St. Tropez.

Diaphanous Lace: These ladystars (and Marc Jacobs) are riding that lace wave championed by her royal highness the Duchess of Cambridge. It's a look we both agree is appropriate for the season and sophisticated enough for the event. Marc Jacobs, you fickle prankster!

Sister Wives: The red carpet is no place to flaunt your insecurities or to subtly reveal your stance on polygamy. Although we kinda like Sister Mia Wasikowska's maroon dress. But are those pit stains or just a shadow?

Anatomy of a Hottie: Hemsworth Edition

How much time did you waste looking at these photos of Chris Hemsworth this week? Personally, I wasted about two hours; three if you include sending out the link to everyone I know, so don’t lie. He is some serious handsome, how could you not be obsessed?

But in case you’re insane and need some convincing please review:

Do yourself a favour and see more.

Happy Friday,


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