Why you aren’t attracted to Ted Mosby**

**this is in no way a personal attack on actor Josh Radner.
Ted, more formally known as Theodor Evelyn Mosby, by all accounts should be attractive. We should all want to date Ted for the following reasons:
  1. He has a good job and is moderately successful at a really young age. Ted is an Architect, a practicing Professor of Architecture, and is designing the new GNB Building, a project that is presumably a big deal in fictional New York City. All very impressive!
  2. He has a nice apartment in New York City. It has exposed brick, two bedrooms, a fire escape AND what seems like rooftop that is instantly accessible via said fire escape.
  3. He is looking to commit. He wants to meet a woman who is ready to get married and settle down. He also plans cute romantic dates, a rare trait that we should all respect.
  4. He is loyal and has great friends.
All of these are valid reasons, but let me be honest, if I am hanging out at McLarens Pub I’m leaving with either Barney or Marshall (sorry, Lilly) and I think you’re doing the same. Ted isn’t even in the running. And here is why:
  1. He has odd style, as everyone on that show does. For people, the girls especially, who live in New York and have good jobs this crew is often off the mark style wise, but I digress. Teds fashions I don’t understand, its college kid meets Grandpa Mosby and I can’t get onboard. I agree with Barney in wishing that he would suit up on occasion.
  2. He’s a bit of a Ross. Ross Geller that is. Obsessed with academia, being right all the time and he is needy. Lacks Marshall’s (Chandler’s) humour and the raw sexual appeal of Barney (or Joey). Ted, these are turnoffs.
  3. He is desperate. He already bought a house for his non-existent family to live in, he tells girls he loves them too soon, he is far too sentimental, lacks confidence and he overanalyses everything (basically he is a girl, I am overanalysing as we speak!).
  4. Last but not least, he is going to grow up to be Bob Saget and tell you really long drawn out stories.
I wish I liked Ted. I really do, but alas I do not.

Regretfully yours,


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